hibird
Capodecina
The Hibird-Obsessed person!
Posts: 169
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Post by hibird on Jan 8, 2010 13:34:10 GMT
[OOC: Ah, ok then. Hurm then I better go reserve Kakipii before anyone takes him!! Lawl its ok if you diss/cuss/swear at her, because I made her to be someone people would want to cuss at xD. <- I enjoy making my characters miserable]
Coltel chose to ignore the brightly colored mafioso standing in front of her, although she had to stop herself from smiling at the words 'my husband'. What, she wonder, would Xanxus say if they ever call him that to his face? They'd probably never live to see another day. Focusing on the glass in her hand, she carried on with what she had intended to do before the three distracted her. With Lussuria's voice going on in the background, she dropped a few exotic looking leaves into the water, and stirred it tentively with a long, silver spoon.
She actually blocked them out quite nicely, until a certain loud shark Squalo ducked behind her. "I'm busy right now," was all she said to him, before going back to carefully stirring the liquid that had gone to a shade of pale pink. But seeing that 'mom' was actually serious about giving him a bath...she had no choice but to get him out of the situation. Not because she wants to, but because she still needs to write a report on their last mission and she had planned on spending the afternoon hunting for new poisons; in other words, it'd be nice to make Squalo owe her and have to repay by finishing all the paperwork.
"You can't have Squalo today," She told Lussuria flatly, moving so that she was standing in between the two. "Boss needs him. I'll make sure that your baby shark washes behind his gills and all that," There, the flamboyant martial-artist can't try to keep the swordsman anymore. She wasn't planning on saving the blonde's sorry hide though, she has no use for him. "Why don't you help Bel-Bel clean up? That way you'd teach him a lesson while getting some mother-and-son time....want a drink?" Giving him a wonderful suggestion, she held out the glass that is now filled with bright pink liquid, while smiling a half-smile that is the closest to a smile she'll ever get to. Turning to Squalo, she sent him a look that read 'Got you out of a tight situation, now repay me by finishing the stack of paperwork Xanxus left me. You owe me this one, sharky'
[OOC: Coltel's nickname is Fatty? LOL. That made my laugh, because I've never thought about that. Hm if that ever becomes official I'll put it into her profile xD]
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Post by Pedo-Pie on Jan 8, 2010 13:55:52 GMT
"What?" Lussuria cried, cupping his face in his hands effeminately. "Daddy wants to take Squ away from me? This isn't fair! The one time I decide to punish him- I mean, it might interfere with his developement to give him special treatment! Still," he sighed, "Daddy is the boss of the family. What he says goes."
Lussuria let out a soft whine and shrug, giving up the plan with slight disappointment. It would have been nice to join Squ in the tub. Oh well. At least he had Bel-bel. And Daddy, of course.
"Fine, fine, go with Aunty Coltel," he said, waving a hand dismissively. "Bel-bel and I'll stay and clean up here. But promise me you'll take a proper bath, hun. I don't want to see encrusted food in that lovely long hair of yours."
Lussuria looked down, noticing the pink liquid being proffered to him by Coltel. "Why, thank you!" he exclaimed, slightly surprised. Maybe she wasn't so bad after all! He held the glass absently, turning to Belphegor. "Do you want a bath instead?" he asked, not really expecting an answer. Screw that, he thought. I wouldn't mind a bath, even if I have to take it alone. I'm tired of all this emotional trauma.
He sighed softly, raising the glass to his lips.
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Post by emayex on Jan 9, 2010 10:38:54 GMT
[OOC: YES, DADDY XANXUS IS HERE!!!!] "Voi, thanks, Fatty!" Squalo called to Coltel, immediately turning to run to the staircase (and not waiting for his 'saviour's' response). He definitely did not want Lussuria to somehow manage to call him back. No, he would leave NOW.
Squalo reached the staircase, taking them two at a time before thundering away to the bathrooms. No matter how many years he had been with Lussuria and the others, Squalo would never grow accustomed to Lussuria's transgender ways, or Bel's 'sharp pointy metal things' fixation.
Squalo's mood brightened considerably when he remembered what he had called to Coltel as a parting shot- it wasn't that the newest Varia member was fat or anything- actually, it was quite on the contrary. But considering the member she had replaced...well, no one could dispute the fact that Gola Mosca was indeed a rather large character.
"VOI," Squalo muttered to himself, more out of habit than any real pressing need to repeat his favourite word. The sooner he could get out of his literal mess, the better. Then perhaps he could rejoin his fellow Varia downstairs and actually get some real food in him.
______________
Xanxus pressed a hand to his forehead, his elbow propped up on an arm rest. He had been up for a few hours already, sitting in his customary pose on his throne like chair- one leg crossed over the other and a hand resting just under his chin. He had been hoping to get some peaceful relaxation, meditating in his chair like this, but just a while ago he had heard a rather loud crash from downstairs, jolting him from his peace. Eyebrows all four of them narrowing in distaste, Xanxus stood, grabbing his Varia coat from a stand and slinging it over his shoulders. His subordinates just couldn't be quiet for one measly hour of the day, could they?
As his hand reached the doorknob, Xanxus turned around, watching a large decanter of wine sitting innocently by his table, with a red wineglass beside it. He sighed, opening the door. It was too early to be even slightly tipsy- besides, if the unrelenting crashes and faint snarls that could be heard from downstairs were any indication of trouble, then Xanxus would have his hands full with dealing with his fellow Varia.
No, perhaps 'fellow' was putting it in a too friendly way. Whatever. Xanxus opened the door, heading out into the corridor. What a waste of daylight, when he could have been lounging around in his chair or destroying trees.
As he reached the top of the stairs, Xanxus was rather surprised to see a foodstain covered Squalo running as fast as he could upwards, brushing past the Varia leader and continuing down the hallway without so much as an apology. Xanxus's hands twitched for a wineglass to throw at the swordsman's back. How rude.
Xanxus began descending the stairs, two blinks the only sign of surprise as he came across the dining room and the kitchen. Only two words could describe the absolute mess. And those two words were: absolute mess.
His four eyebrows drew even closer together, his face beginning to form a scowl. "What on earth is going on?" Xanxus hissed, staring at the three Varia standing rather guiltily in the mess (this can be taken figuratively and literally). After another pause, he spoke again. "And does Squalo have anything to do with this?
[OOC: Woah...*slightly dizzy from writing all of that* NOTE: CC WOULD LIKE TO SAY THAT SHE IS POSTING CURRENTLY AND WANTS NO INTERRUPTIONS AS HER POST IS UBER LONG AND TAKING QUITE A WHILE. PLEASE BE PATIENT AND WAIT FOR HER RESPONSE? BECAUSE APPARENTLY SHE HAS RESERVED IT. THANK YOU, COME AGAIN.]
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Post by C.C. on Jan 9, 2010 12:06:16 GMT
[OOC: WARNING: LONG POST AHEAD............ (Translation: Bel hasn't even replied and two new characters joined and...basically, you guys are fast xDD Maybe I should make Bel exit, I'm not going to have too much time on the internet ^^ LOL BEL-BEL KILL ME! And Max, I'm killing you later.)] "You do know that it'll come out of your salary, don't you, br-Belphegor?"
Behind his fringe, Bel's eyes narrowed in suspicion. Salary? That sounded too much like Mammon for his liking (because only Mammon could be Mammon). Not to mention the word she had almost let slip..."Shishishi, what?"
[/color] he drawled, absently grabbing one of the few chairs which weren't ruined and taking a seat in that. "Squalo did most...all of it,"[/color] he added proudly, looking around and thinking. With such a selective memory, it was predictable that he would think it wasn't his fault. He opened his mouth to say one of the thousands of excuses he kept in the back of his mind, but Lussuria beat him to it. 'Daddy Xanxus' definitely amused him, but what came next did not. "Boys, I'm afraid I'm going to have to punish you. You're behaviour was totally unnacceptable!"Bel rolled his eyes; even if they were hidden, the meaning was clear. So what? He had heard that thousands of times, and each time had royally escaped from punishment. Well, almost each time, but he didn't remember the times he was 'punished'. His grin widened when he heard the 'punishment' Squalo was supposed to do. Hopefully the swordsman would get something more bloody than the sick painting from before. But then it was his turn. Bel-bel..."Bel's eyes widened in surprise and he began to protest (as everyone knew he would). What was this new-found...nickname...thing?! "Oi, Lussuria..."[/color] he started, a slight menacing tone entering his voice. The next few words made him pause. "You are going to stay here and clean this mess up. All by yourself, mind, and no slacking off."Silence. Inwardly, Prince the Ripper burst out laughing. Cleaning up this? There was no way a prince like himself- no, a genius prince like himself was going to clean up this mess. This was why there were peasants - to do the dirty work that royalty like himself refused to touch. Outwardly, his grin merely widened to breaking point. "...What? Clean this? Shishishi, the prince refuses."[/color] Bel had expected Squalo to start screaming his head off, and he was not disappointed. However, his good mood evaporated as suddenly as it had came. "Don't treat me like the knife kiddy over there!"His grin hardened, and the one knife behind his back suddenly turned into five, ready to throw at a moment's notice. Bel wasn't sure who he was aiming them at, but all three seemed good. "If you continue, the 'knife kiddy' will kill you," he sang, but instead of amusement there was an icy underlying tone. "Why don't you help Bel-Bel clean up? That way you'd teach him a lesson while getting some mother-and-son time..."It was surprising how Bel could change emotions so quickly. One moment it was glee, and then anger, and now it was horror. Lussuria. 'Helping' him. To clean up. What. "That is not happening," Bel stated flatly. The five knives behind his back turned to ten, all aimed at Lussuria. If that pervert so much as took a step towards him...Besides, they were equal grounds as Varia Officers, so Lussuria had no right to order him around. Bel ignored Lussuria's question about a bath. The answer was so obvious even Levi could guess. And that was saying something. After Squalo fled upstairs, Bel's acute hearing picked up the sound of footsteps. Fearing for the worst, he turned his head a little in time to see Xanxus descend mightily, eyes dark with imfamous anger and his cape billowing behind him. The thought that he had been 'in control' of the situation that had been there a moment ago disappeared. "Boss..."[/color] he said, faltering ever so slightly. "Squalo had everything to do with it,"[/color] he added with a grin.[/blockquote][/blockquote] [OOC: I'm sorry for the long-ness. And I don't expect anyone to reply to the majority Bel's random ramblings, because it was from ages ago and I just needed to reply to all of it xD Also, because Max apparently tells me the table's ruined, I changed it to a chair. Because apparently tables get food stains even if all the food's on the tablecloth and nobody threw food after the tablecloth was tossed away. (And I didn't know that)]
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hibird
Capodecina
The Hibird-Obsessed person!
Posts: 169
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Post by hibird on Jan 9, 2010 12:09:56 GMT
[OOC: ima take this post! no one post until I finish this one!!]
It took every ounce of her willpower to make herself take the putrid-looking glass from Lussuria in one swift move. It would have been so easy just to watch him drain the glass, and later on realise that he's been poisoned, and watch him go through ranges of expressions in amuse. But, she had to stop him, sadly. The drink wouldn't kill him, but having to find an antidote just because of him isn't exactly a fun thing to do.
"Nevermind," she said, as though it explained everything, and balanced the glass in one hand while fishing for a vial with the other. Hearing Squalo storming up the stairs - no doubt he hadn't seen the parting glare -- she sighed to herself. She'd go chase after him later...that shark's probably off to hog the showers. Maybe she'd inflitrate the pipes and put in some liquids that'll turn his hair blue.
She was about to make her leave, when she felt the ever so familiar prescence of their boss. "Xanxus-Sama," she acknowledged, bowing her head in respect (as she always did). She felt a bit happy, because now that he's here that knife brat would get what he deserves...until realising that she was also standing amidst the mess, which makes her seem guilty as well. "I entered the find those three - Squalo was here just now - destroying the place," She reported like always, being the tattle-tale she is. "Squalo has some contributions to it, as always," she added, slightly smugly since now she has someone to put the blame on...and a way to get back at him for the new nickname.
[OOC: oh yay Xanxus is here! xD]
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Post by emayex on Jan 9, 2010 14:01:16 GMT
[OOC: What?! No, Coltel, you can't turn Squalo into a smurf!!!]
Xanxus swept a secondary gaze around the room, putting two and two together and definitely not liking what he saw. "Someone had better have a good explanation for this," he growled, stalking forwards. "I was thinking of actually having breakfast for once."
Something squished beneath Xanxus's boot as he walked across the floor - moving his heel he discovered that it was the remnants of a potato (probably from Bel's breakfast), now smeared across the underside of his boot. Xanxus scowled.
"That's it," he spat. "The three of you clean up this mess, now." He raised a hand, forestalling any objections. "I don't care if you didn't have a part in this- I want this room perfect and polished before noon. If anyone stumbled across Varia headquarters looking like this..."
Xanxus's eyes narrowed. "Chop chop."
[OOC: ARGH, I'M SORRY IT'S SO CRAPPY, CC MADE ME DO THIS IN LIKE 5 MINS!!!! NOW OFF FOR SLEEEEEPZ.]
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Post by C.C. on Jan 9, 2010 14:08:28 GMT
[OOC: VOOOOOIIIIIIII!!!!!! THIS ISN'T MY FAULT! It's your fault you can't type fast enough and it's your fault you chose Boss. =P And what do you mean 'probably from Bel's breakfast'? (My attempt at being IC for Squalo failed badly)] Bel felt his mouth open slightly at those words, and then mentally shook himself and closed it again. Being ordered around by Lussuria and disobeying was one matter. Being ordered around by Xanxus and disobeying was completely different. One would lead to a slightly insane ranting, using a very girly voice, ranting about very girly stuff. The other would get you killed.
And Prince the Ripper was genius enough to know when to follow orders, even when he didn't like it.
"Shishishi, boss,"
[/color] he spoke, knowing it would probably be the last thing he'd ever say. Squalo did most of it. Get him to clean it up...too."[/color] He added the last word somewhat reluctantly. It implied that he, a prince! was going to clean up this mess. What happened to all the servants around here? ...Oh yeah. Mammon didn't want to pay for all of them. Bel mentally headbashed, before turning to the other members in the room and glaring daggers at them. Not literally. The message was clear enough - if one of you force me, a prince, to clean up with you commoners, you'll find a million knives in your back. And if Squalo wasn't going to clean up as well...he would be dead. Bel was not a happy prince.[/blockquote][/blockquote]
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Post by Pedo-Pie on Jan 9, 2010 15:13:04 GMT
Lussuria flexed his fingers, eyebrows furrowed in confused dismay when Coltel snatched the glass away from him. How rude! He'd been about to drink that! He was just about to complain, when his brain suddenly caught up with his eyes.
"Da- I mean, Boss!" he exclaimed, taking an involuntary step backwards (and treading on something crunchy). "Why, I didn't see you there! Were you looking for something to eat?" he babbled nervously, groping around for something he could hide behind. He was ignored, however, as the feared Varia leader began to bark out orders. Lussuria felt his jaw drop slightly as he was told- no, commanded- to help clean up the kitchen.
How perfectly awful! It was true he was the Varia mother, but to be constantly cleaning up after everyone else! He shouldn't be doing menial chores like this, when he himself was a feared member of the Varia. Even if he was their mother. Lussuria sniffed. He really should complain about it to the boss. He opened his mouth to speak. "Uhm..."
That is, until, the Boss turned and raised an eyebrow at him.
Damn.
"Right away, Boss," he finished lamely, lips betraying him. Crap. Looks like disobeying the Varia leader was actually physically impossible. Literally.
[OOC: All this Lussuria-dissing...it's killing me...OTL]
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hibird
Capodecina
The Hibird-Obsessed person!
Posts: 169
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Post by hibird on Jan 10, 2010 4:06:53 GMT
Cotel didn't drop her jaws when she heard the order about cleaning up the kitchen, but she felt like doing so. She, clean up? There is no way in a million years that she'll ever clean this mess up! She wasn't even the one who did all of it!
Glaring at Bel and Lussuria, she sent them a look that said 'if you make me clean this up, I'm going to poison both of you.' And where is Squalo? He did most of the mess and now all he has to do is sit in a bubble bath and wash his hair three times?
"As you wish, Boss," she said, but made no move to clean up. Figuring something out, she added slyly, "But before that, maybe you would want to ask Lussuria about the new, er, title he's given you."
Now that there is someone for Xanxus to focus on, she carefully slinked towards the door slowly and silently. On her way, she picked up the glasses that hadn't broke yet, and slipped them into her jacket. That way no one could say that she did not clean up. Xanxus didn't say how much she has to clean up, anyways. With luck, he'll be so focused on the other two that he won't notice her disappear...
[OOC: Ah, poor Lussuria...xD]
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Post by emayex on Jan 11, 2010 8:38:50 GMT
Xanxus's eyebrows raised ever so slightly at Coltel's statement, his eyes sliding over to meet Lussuria's. He didn't miss Coltel's suspicious shifting to the side, but let it slide - for the moment.
"A new...title?" he asked, his voice deceptively calm. Well. Perhaps he didn't want to know.
Xanxus brushed past the three shocked looking Varia, heading towards the counter, which looked relatively unscathed. It was slow progress, as he had to pick his way through the...well, crap littering the way, although he attempted to make it look elegant. When he actually reached the counter, Xanxus picked out a plate. True, it looked a mess, but from experience he knew Lussuria's cooking was better tasting than it looked.
Reaching the stain splattered table, Xanxus clunked his plate down, stabbing his fork into the plate. As he lifted it up, he turned to the others in the room, raising his eyebrows. "Well?" he drawled, popping the...thing...he had just picked up with his fork into his mouth. "Sometime this century would be fine, trash.
Xanxus sighed when the three still didn't make a move. He wondered which one of the three would be the most amusing to verbally abuse at the moment.
"Oh, and Coltel?" Xanxus asked rather off-handedly. "Do come back."
_______________
Squalo laughed to himself loudly in the bath, squishing an obscene amount of shampoo into his hair. While he took a nice bubbly bath, an equally food stained Bel, Lussuria and Coltel would be downstairs, possibly helping clean up. Silly Fatty! She should have taken one look at the kitchen before running for the hills.
Oh well. Her loss, his gain.
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Post by Pedo-Pie on Jan 11, 2010 9:44:42 GMT
Lussuria blanched.
"Maybe you'd want to ask Lussuria about the new, er, title he's given you."
Oh no she didn't.
Oh no she DIDN'T.
Lussuria didn't bother picking his jaw back up off the floor. The way he saw it, something would probably happen to make it drop all over again, if today's recent events were anything to go by.
But never mind that, what mattered now was the BOSS.
Right now, Lussuria was internally warring with himself whether to be frightened out of his mind of Xanxus, or full of murderous rage toward Coltel. Either way, it seemed he was soon going to die.
He settled for murderous rage.
Lussuria turned quietly to face the retreating Coltel, fingers flexing in anticipation of strangling her to death from behind. He advanced silently, unseen, arms outstretched-
"Oh, and Coltel, do come back."
Lussuria paused.
A sinister smile broke across his face.
"Yes, Coltel, dear, do come back," he purred, all sickly sweet. "You haven't finished showing Bel and I the effects of that wonderful new poison of yours; you know, the one you put in the food, so we could see its effect the moment the very next person started eating?"
[OOC: LOL I feel b*tchy.]
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hibird
Capodecina
The Hibird-Obsessed person!
Posts: 169
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Post by hibird on Jan 11, 2010 10:34:06 GMT
[OOC: Lol xD This whole thread is making me laugh so much]
Hearing Xanxus' order, she stiffled a sigh and stopped inching towards the door. She really should've just left Squalo to the mercy of Lussuria, shouldn't she? That way, she'd be off doing something like...paperworks...instead of getting in trouble with the boss. When it wasn't even her fault. She is really going to infiltrate his shower water later.
She heard Lussuria invite her back in, and narrowed her eyes slightly. What was he trying to do? Then, she stiffled just a bit. New poison? What? She never placed a single drop of the liquid into the food. Coltel was about to say 'well there isn't anyone eating right now,' when she noticed Xanxus eating on...something. Oh, crap.
Now what is she supposed to do? Stay quiet and be framed for another thing she didn't do, or speak up and get involved in a heated argument, which'll result in Xanxus possibly blowing up the room? Either way, it is certain that she'll not get away unscathed this time. And...that Lussuria. She'll have to get back at him somehow. She was just pointing out the unnecessary facts, while he made up an entire lie. Trying to put the attention on him, she replied smoothly, and equally politely, "Oh, but I told you that there wouldn't be any reactions, didn't I? The liver and vinegar from your cooking evens out the poison, and budding potatoes are part of the antidote for it...so I'll say that whoever's eating the food is safe from it."
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Post by Pedo-Pie on Jan 11, 2010 10:48:53 GMT
Lussuria's eyebrow twitched slightly behind Armani shades, but he didn't allow his smile to falter. Oh, so she was gonna play it like that, was she? Fine. Two could play hardball.
Lussuria tittered prettily behind his hand. "Liver? What liver?" he asked, voice oozing honey. "I didn't use any in my cooking today. And, oh, my, I only put vinegar in the salad dressing, which, unfortunately, happens to be all over the floor and not on anyone's plate."
[OOC: HAHAHA CATFIGHT. OH MAI. I'TS TIME TO HEAT THINGS UP, HIBIRD XDDD Hey, wait. I just realised. SINCE WHEN DO PEOPLE EAT POTATOES FOR BREAKFAST? D:]
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hibird
Capodecina
The Hibird-Obsessed person!
Posts: 169
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Post by hibird on Jan 11, 2010 13:54:14 GMT
[OOC: oh my... xD]
So he knows how to play, Coltel mused. That can be a good thing and a bad thing. Bad, because perhaps, just maybe, he'd get her. Good thing, because things are just getting quite interesting...either way they're all going to get punished by Xanxus, so why not be entertained while doing so?
"Really? But I swear I saw a piece of it floating around next to the brussel sprouts...Did I mis-saw the kidney as liver then? Oh well, any type of intestine would work," she said in a care-free way, before waving a hand as though Lussuria had said something silly. After years of watching Lussuria do that move, it's been quite easy to imitate it. "It's all over the floor right now, but when you knocked it over most of it spilled into the food,"
"We should be cleaning up this mess so Xanxus-Sama can eat in peace," Coltel announced suddenly, as though the thought had just came to her. This is going to be fun... She quickly took some broken plates, and started to stack them together, before pausing to look back at Lussuria. "Lussuria, why aren't you helping? You can start by cleaning up the piles of food by your foot," she said.
[OOC: I'm not sure...xD]
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Post by emayex on Jan 11, 2010 20:58:53 GMT
[OOC: Uhm, wow. Well, I generally don't eat these crazy things for breakfast..usually I just stick to MILO AND TOAST....but it all began when I gave Bel something funny looking to eat.] Squalo raised a hand, peering at it closely. Damn, he was getting wrinkled from sitting in the bathtub for so long. Grabbing a fluffy white towel, the swordsman hoisted himself out from the bath, wrapping it around him.
He wondered what he was going to do after this. Going back downstairs wasn't really an option...for all he knew, Lussuria could still be there, attempting to give people baths. And Squalo was sure that Coltel wouldn't save him a second time.
But on the other hand, if he went up to his room he would be stuck in there for the whole day, possibly working on Coltel's paperwork.
Squalo resolved to put on his clothes first. He didn't want to go down to the kitchen to face Lussuria with only a towel- the mental images of that were disturbing to say in the least. [OOC: LOL, I didn't know whether to write 'shower' or 'bath' because we all have differing opinions...] ____________ Xanxus yawned, just watching Coltel and Lussuria arguing with each other about food of all things. Food! And the apparent poison- or otherwise cures in the form of potatoes.
He looked suspiciously at his plate and the innocent looking food that sat there. Would Coltel really have put poison in there? Possibly. Would Lussuria have put liver, vinegar or any kind of intestine in there? No, definitely not. The green haired man wasn't suicidal, and all of the Varia would have come hunting for him if he had. Intestines for breakfast! How disgusting.
"Shut up," Xanxus suddenly interrupted the two quarrelers. "You're loud.
The Varia leader paused for a moment, before glaring at Coltel. "Unless you were blind, you would see that I picked up a vegetarian plate," he drawled. [OOC: Ah! I disappear for a moment and you two run away!! And I suspect Bel is just sitting on his chair looking bored...Hmmm...]
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